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You just dunno

Dear blog,
Just stopping by to say hello and wish everyone a  double happiness during this first week of the year 2013.
Hope we can still see each other and hang out for good.
Anyway, I'll be back in IPg tomorrow, and I hope this coming semester will be a nice one for me. That's it! bye

(^__^)

Change for the better

Dear blog, 

I was quite dizzy this morning....up to the afternoon  I felt like vomiting....

2012 is nearly come to an end. Ok let me put this way, aku harap sepanjang tahun ini, aku dah buat yang terbaik, untuk diri aku, mak ayah dan juga orang sekeliling....Aku pohonkan sekali lagi kepada Allah supaya hari-hari mendatang akan ada sinar baru buat aku, untuk aku terus membaiki diri, membetulkan kesalahan aku, dan moga aku masih lagi berada di jalan yang lurus dan diredhai Allah. Apa yang penting dalam hidup ini ialah, aku dapat menunaikan tanggungjawab aku sabagai seorang anak dan hamba kepada Allah. Masih banyak yang aku perlu lakukan bagi menjadi seorang mukmin yang cemerlang. Sebagai seorang manusia, aku tidak terlepas dari berbuat dosa, dosa kepada ibu bapa, pada adik beradik, dosa pada kawan-kawan, dan paling aku rasa malu ialah pada Tuhan yang satu. Kita tidak dijanjikan hidup selama-lamanya, dan wajib bagi kita untuk mati. Dan ini lah yang paling aku takutkan. Sebelum aku pergi aku perlukan satu perubahan besardalam hidup aku. Tapi aku masih tak kuat, tiap kali aku ingin melakukan sesuatu, pasti ada ujian yang datang. Dan ini betullah dar apa yang orang cakap, Allah menguji kita terhadap perkara yang kita ingin lakukan, samada kita bersungguh-sungguh atau tidak. Aku harap, bibir ini akan terus mengukir kalimah syahadah dan terus mengikat tali iman didada. Cuti bulan 12 ini telah aku usahakan dengan membantu mak dirumah, mak  yang dah uzur, perlu bagi aku sebagai anak tunggal memberi sepenuh perhatian padanya. Rugilah pada mereka yang tak dapat berbakti kepada ibu bapa mereka. Aku tak mahu menyesal di kemudian hari. Sekiranya aku tidak dapat memberikan mak dan ayah wang dan kekayaan sekali pun, aku harap dengan membantu meringankan beban mereka pun sudah memadai. Wahai Allah yang telah menciptakan sekalian makhluk, berilah aku peluang untuk terus berbakti kepada kedua ibubapa disamping kekal teguh pada taliMu...Bagi hari-hari yang akan datang....moga satu sinar kebahagiaan akan menunggu aku...Thanks for this life ya Allah....Thanks for the rahmat that you give me...

‎"To tell you the truth, If He’s tested you greatly, He loves you dearly." — Unknown. 

And Alhamdulillah for that ♥

^^

^^

Sundae....

Dear blog,

2012 is about to come to an end. I'd like to take the opportunity to thank all my friends and family for the happiness we shared together all this while. Next year is going to be a hectic time for me again and I have to adapt to a new situation. I also have to not to expect things on a silver platter but to always learn the hard way because this would mean I will be sharpening the saw. I want to be a contributor of ideas rather than a user. 

Usually people will spend their time to review what they've been doing during the year, but for me its kinda boring. Haha...Though would find sometime to review 2012.

As you can see, the Koala is like holding a gun...LOL~

I named him Stevie..."howaya doin' mate?"

Yesterday I went out to meet a friend. She's in her semester break and would probably going back to Australia again early February next year. 

She brought me few souvenirs and I like them very much^^ 

she's truly a good friend!

We spent our day at the nearby kepC eating our breakfast and lunch together. I brought some old school magazines so we could reminisce the old days in school back then. We talked about the teachers we hated and loved the most, stories of some of the backstabbing friends, and some few others stories of our teenage dreams 

during the school days.

I had no chance to meet the rest of our 5zuhrah's family, but I was happy though to meet her. Some of our brothers and sisters are still struggling for their final exam, so they wont make it if we would have our family gathering this Dec. Just HOPING that I can still see and meet them all next year. 

Toodles...

Have a great weekend!

My Precious one

Dear blog, 

This is Ummu Hanny Balqisy. She'll be 3 years old this coming January and her top most favorite things are; 1. her granny 'apah' instead calling my mother 'opah' or 'nenek' she's comfortably calling her granny as 'apah'. 2. Her mum and dad of course...  3. Rambutan.... 4. me, her uncle... "chu Mamat"  5. pens, picture books and colours as well.

^^

Mum, me and my sister..

She is an active girl and one of the funniest and sweetest little girls in the world. She likes to go outside of the house helping her apah cleaning the leaves and she loves rambutan so much. Actually she doesn't know how to pronounce 'rambutan' axactly as it should be, instead she just go with the last syllable 'tan'. Whenever she sees her apah 'kait' the rambutan, she'd yell from the house, and says "apah...buah tan....!!". I still can hear her cute voice echoing inside my ears. She learns very well and quite amazingly she does everything herself. We just taught her once and she managed to do things herself, like putting on her shoes, identifying correctly which one is the right and the left, and she can differentiate quite a number of things now. That means I can't cheat on her anymore. Pfftt..

Hanny also likes to cheer everybody up with her smile and laughter. You know, although she's only 2 years old, she can recognize people pretty good. She continually progressed further than we ever expected. She can run, talk a little bit, dance, talking with her grandpa on the phone. 

She loves her grandpa so much. She must have been missing him since my father went to Sabah last month and probably will come back next week. My father used to taught her Zikrullah, touched a lil bit on prayer, and now she continues to learn them from her mum. My sister taught her to recite Al-fatihah, Al-ikhlas and few others surah too. She enjoyed reciting it so much. AND not to forget, Hanny doesn't really care about cartoon, she likes to watch Nat Geo along with her granny apah, and me as well. We live in kampung where we can easily see birds, monkeys, and few others, this eventually help to boost Hanny's mind. Rather than watching them on Tv, it is very good to let her see with her own eyes. right..?

Anyway,..

I really wanted to spend more time with her as I possibly could as well lend a hand with her care. Soon I will be in Ipoh to start a new life there. I'll miss her. 

That's just a bit about my niece Hanny, hope I can talk more about her in the future.

Talk soon, bye!

Stop here for a minute or so and listen to what I have to say

Dear blog...

I don't really know how to begin, where to start, what to say.....it seems so wrong to me.

All this while, I just being the type of person that I have always been. Always, after something terrible had happened to me I'll have this big question, "where have I been wrong?"... As a normal person, I experience hard and good times...I personally think that the 'wanted-to-be-a-perfectionist' thing isn't very helpful either. Sometimes I can consider myself as a mean, and egoistic type of person who wanting perfection in life until I forgot that nothing in this world is perfect. 

To become a perfectionist type of working machine sometimes is really tiring and doesn't work at all. I am a human being after all, often forget things, do  feel bad if I can't do best in lief, and forget things easily. I don't like to forget things because I don't like to give excuses. Nobody like excuses. (Except for reasonable excuses) It is just lame and so not appropriate at all. However, I did give excuses sometimes. Hopefully I won't do it again. Its just the same when it comes to my social life, where I often forgot to take care of other people's feelings...

I don't know why I have this big mouth kinda thing. Really pissing me off. Though, I'm not the kind of person who always running around like mice whenever I see problems. There's nothing wrong with it right?.. But what I really stress out about is, I may not be able to do things right, to achieve better, or even I might fail....sometimes I doubt myself...I feel angry, anxious, and...throwing tantrums all the times...this actually not because of the problems, but because I can't do it. I feel useless. What is wrong with me!!?? I have to keep strong and motivate myself no matter how the ups and downs are. If this plain grounds scare the hell out of me, then I won't be able to face the real world. The world doesn't go with my expectation all the time. I can run, but I can't escape from problems unless I face them. 

Everything in this world happened with a reason. I'm not alone. If I say I'm suck, actually there's a lot people out there even more sucker than me. Grow up! and face it. Be grateful. Live your life!! Okay! I can bear it, trust me. I'm happy for being like this, for who I am. Just need to be careful next time and improve myself a little bit more. I can do it. Just stay strong and be sensible. We're different, you're different. So What the hell are you afraid of, each person is gifted with talents and advantages..make use of the talent you have. I try to give myself a chance, not once but many times already. 

This is not a big problem helloo..wake up!! The thing is, I need to live with it and accept it with an open arms. Deserve it. I need to learn to accept my weaknesses and try to understand why things happen, and find solutions, so that I can improve myself to the better. That's it! Whatever things that will happen in the future, try to handle it well. Stay calm..

This was it...in about two hours ago the answer I have been dying to know had finally been revealed. Guess what? I did it quite well, and feel 'OKAy' about it. I don't care how much people strive for their's but I do care about mine. I need to work hard next time and try not to be so 'berlagak sombong'. Anyway, let us just forget about it. All in all I have did my best and still the results are good and be happy about it.

 All I wanted to say is, I'm so grateful and thank you to Allah for His blessing, not to forget, to mak and ayah for their doa and blessing as well, thank you sooo much....For my beloved friends, who always be there for me and support one and another during our hectic time, thank you so much. Let us be together and sail through this Degree program until we graduate. I have to bear in mind that I want to be an educator who not only teach but to become a source of inspiration, and knowledge and of course to change the world's perspectives of looking at certain things. 'A great student lies on a great teacher'. Congratulations to me of course ^^ and to my friends, I believe that we can success in the future. Insyaallah.!

Till then. Good day people..

Its just thoughts

Dear blog, I always wanted to write something educational..
something that people can refer to and would be useful to them. 
Especially for those who struggling with language or whatsoever. The thing is I myself still struggling and even worst you know. I was thinking of sharing a bit of information about how to write a composition, or how to start a conversation or even sharing notes on a particular subject.
So much to think of, and really, I wanted to do it so badly. Oh yeah, why don't I start of by doing book review.. and I'm pretty much good about it. I can talk about the characters, plot, the symbolism..the writer...etc...and try to relate it to my daily life or what not..
I always go for humanistic novel  or even mysterious kind of thing. Not to forget, I will pick up the one with 'The Number One Bestseller' and of course vintage books..
These books offer me a great deal with English language and most of the writers write very well.. and plus what more can you find in these kind of books anyway?. Its so fascinating reading novels during my free time.
Its like engaging myself into a new world and giving me a new perspective of life. So for me, its really important to be careful of choosing which genres that suit me the best as might not want to waste time reading rubbish. 
So I guess I have to plan very carefully of what I wanted to do and have the ideas at the back of my mind before I can start writing anything.  Planing is easy, but when it comes to do it, you'll know how hard it is. Anyway, its good to have this kind of thoughts in mind, it makes me excited and wanted to do more in life.

Till then, have a nice day people..

^^ After sometimes...

Dear blog, 
Its been like forever since my last post and up till now I still dunno what I was doing at home during the holidays.
Nothing much really...
I really wanted to write everything down, single handedly... I really did!
BUt guess what? The Mr Time just won't lend me a hand to write them.
There were just too much to do and to squeeze this little blog onto the list just seemed impossible.
this morning, I sat in the back garden drinking tea. It was a damp grey Dec morning, even the sun won't show itself. not a glimpse...
I'm quite sad because most of the time I spent was at home with my family although I had longed for it since. Since my friend Rizal had an accident and had a broken ribs, I can't go anywhere with him also the rest of my friends. Some of them gone back to study already, seems like I stuck here forever. 
This oddness is telling me that I will have a boring holidays.... Though I try to tell myself that everything was fine. 

Hola!

Wow it has been two weeks since the holidays started.
Still I stuck here in the room with my kittens...huhu
I'm waiting for my friends to come back next week and would spend my time with them.
Ahhh...what a tiring morning! I woke up quite early today and made myself busy with chores.
First, I clean up my room and get rid of everything which I dun need anymore like old clothes, exercise books...and what not.
Then moved to living room and kitchen. hihi Rajin btul aku kan? hoho
Naahh clean sudah.....
^^
Now its time for me to watch some plain old movies and listen to the snsd's new songs...
anyway guys, have a nice and wonderful weekend.

something fer you

Dear blog,
I finally got home with my family, after several weeks away from them.
Today, I would like to share with you something that you can do during this holidays.

 

Enjoy!


 

It's time

Dear blog, 

This is the last day of my second semester in degree pogram in this IPG...

I have to admit it, I don't really want to go back..

Feel like I want to stay here...

Macam semalam je baru masuk IPg,...

jumpa kwan2... masuk kelas...gaduh dgn kwan...

Mood ke kelas tu masih ade lagi....

bila smua tu dah tak de, aku rase sunyi.....

Masa memang cepat berlari....

Miss surau so much...miss my blok H so much...miss blok siantan...miss library....miss makcik canteen....oh my...there's surely have stories behind all that.....^^

friends....my cats...and everything lah....

Di ipg ni lah banyak kenangan.....

Where can I find a place like this in the world...

semua ada memory masing2....

Saat bersama dengan orang yang tersayang....

Bila dah cuti sem ni, semua tu hanya sekadar memory....

yang pasti akan kekal abadi...kan3? hehe

Till then,

Happy Holiday Everyone...

^^

^^

Study!

Dear blog,
Am doing the very last group study of this sem with my friends...
Hopefully everything will going to be fine tomorrow.
Istiqamah.....^^

The door is closing soon enough....
can't wait to get home.

 

Saya hevat! hehe

Take a break guys!

One more to go....
I only can HOPE....
Insyaallah...

now lets take a break...
enjoy this...
hahahahah

Phew

Dear blog,

Today I sat for my second paper.

The questions were quite hard!

I hope I answer them correctly.

Thank you to mak, for the doa.

Two more to go!

oh yeah, don't trust spotted questions....

learn by heart...and don't memorize...

try my best to understand...

keep on trying....

Till then...

Bliss in the morning

Hi there blog. we meet again.
This morning I was quite sleepy and can't concentrate on my study.
Keep on falling asleep as always.
I begin this wonderful morning with good musics and simple breakfast.
Nothing have been happening here and I feel that quite boring. 
Getting my life balance going, waiting for holiday.
But now, have to stick my head focus on exam, open all things necessary.
Feels good though.

Hmm...so posting here more regularly doesn't seem to have fun. haha








 

Allah will do the rest

"Hasbunallah wanikmal wakil" ♥ 

Begin each day with faith in your heart, and know that no matter how steep the mountain, Allah is with you as you climb. Every day do your best, Allah will do the rest. 

 

All the best!

^^

Be creative in the classroom

Dear blog, I just found this in the internet and wanted to share it here.
This can be useful for teaching language arts in the classroom.
Take few simple steps and there you have it.
Would find myself a time doing this during the holidays..


Enjoy!








Have a good week.

The way I see it

Dear blog,

This morning I sat for my Children's Literature paper.

I was quite nervous and worried all morning. Worried if I'd forget everything I had read before.

Luckily I managed to do it. 

The questions were easy , but still there were some confusing parts that got me almost crying. Haha, but don't worry everything will be fine.

This exam week also make me coming down with a sore throat, cold and little anxiety. Now that all the stress has gone a bit and happier times are warming my heart. BUt its not the right time to be happy though. My body feels safe to let go a little bit, I guess.
3 more to go!

Please....be optimistic!

Lets pray. " O' Allah, give me strength, make things easy for me, don't let me go astray.."

Mistake

Dear blog, 

I just did something that made my friend hate me forever.

I was not thinking before I said that. I truly am sorry.

The words came out from my mouth just like that.

Urghh... this time around, my attitude really pissing me off.

He already hates me, and I added some more today.

Seriously I'm sorry. 

It was a mistake.

He said that it was ok when I said I'm sorry, but seems like he wasn't.

I have a big mouth and couldn't do much about it.

I think its time for me to zip my lips and close it forever!

I suppose to do something useful tonight instead I did something wrong!

Wrong....wrong...wrong....

after all, it was a mistake.

drooling

Sunday's update

Dear blog,

In the past few days I've been forcing myself to do something I've never been comfortable with, doing things alone. Sure, I'm alone doing all the reading stuff all day, but I was thinking about heading out for mini adventures to clear my mind. Indeed, I went to pay a visit to my friend's house along with my classmates. Quite an amazing trip for me as I was the one who drove the car from Ipoh to Teluk Intan. pfft 

A trip with more time with friends will happen again someday, I hope. ^^

As someone who only live 'my life the fullest' and struggle with so much anxiety now and then, I'm not really sure what has changed in my attitude to try so hard to work on my studies lately. Maybe approaching the end of the semester of this 2012 has just flipped a switch in me. I'm in full-blown mode trying to finish my studies and make myself ready for action while on top of all the other work I have to do before sitting for exam.

Have a good weekend!

Alone and bored

 

Dear blog, I've been doing my reading since this afternoon but I kept on falling asleep. I'm tired....

私が心配 WOrry

Dear blog,

We meet again this time. Nothing to talk about actually. I will be sitting for exam soon enough. I'm really worried.  I've been watching korean dramas recently and teared myself out. I'm getting really excited about the dramas so far. I think I should be excited about exam instead right?

I don't know, exam makes me want to tear my hair out but thinking of the future calms me a bit. I haven't finished the reading, so guess I need to work on it as soon as possible.

(Longing for some wonderful time with friends and family...)

 

Ok that's all, end boring post!

これはかわいいです

 

 ありがとう、また来て...

 Arigato,..

Cool is it?

It is a traditional Japanese straw footwear or sandal. I think its cool.
Would like to have a pair. 

Sushi G

Hi blog,
Stopping by for awhile.
Just stumbled with this cute logo in the internet. Google always make us fun with their logos.
This is sushi style obviously. 
I do like sushi, but sometimes its kinda boring eating raw food. Yucks!

Was at home. Sick.

Dear blog,

I need someone to take me to go to amazing road trip this holiday. Even though the holiday is not there yet, I've plan to go to so many interesting places already! 

Not to forget, exam is around the corner! I've got a lot to prepare..

Over the recent weekend, I was sick all day long and decided to go home straight on Sunday morning. I went to a nearby clinic on Saturday, and my stomach was in such pain, until I've asked the doctor to give me an injection. She said I'm having an appendix or what so ever, and wrote a letter for me to refer to the hospital Raja Permaisuri Bainun on that day. However, I didn't go. I decided to go back home and went to slim river hospital for further checkup. So to the hospital I went. There I admitted myself, and they put me in emergency room as I was still in pain that day. The pain was in the right side of the abs, and further they took blood and urine sample to test whether I have such disease. After a moment, they came up to me and I was told that, I was having acute  gastritis, and the pain I felt was due to the air trapped inside the intestine. Nonetheless, I'm glad because I'm free from any surgery. Only have one word for that, Alhamdulillah.  

While I was home for two days, my mind raced thinking of all the things I could do while I was there. I could watch all of the TV shows and movies I loved and listen to my favorite songs. I could eat whatever I want without judgement. In fact, I was celebrating my free-from-surgery with KFC (my sister's treat). But I can't always be happy though,because, we just don't know when is our turn. 

Oh yeah, I also kept myself busy at night with literature and some books I brought home. I enjoyed myself doing the reading stuff while watching korean movies. I always wanted to do myself a favor and pick up some joy while I'm doing something. It would also make a great time for the whole day and design a wonderful image in my life.

Till then, good bye.

Thanks for visiting. 

Jealous? hell no!

 

Pffffftttt!!  Only idiots would believe this!

Just sway with it

 

Hi there again blog, I just wanted to pop in to say hello because I think I need to say so. hehe. I need to say that I' m sorry to all my friends out there if I did something wrong, I really am sorry. Needless to say, this week has been very hectic and so will be to upcoming weeks. I have to be prepared for exams. I want to thank to those of you who left me wonderful feedback when I needed the most. I was really touched. Glad to have friends like you guys. I know that there was a bit problem over some things like you know, so-called friendship-love-problems. But after awhile, I've learned that I really can't please everyone. like we used to hear, the more you grow, the more polar opposite criticism you’ll hear. Doing everything myself, and decide what’s good for my study and life. It's amazing and  a fascinating time to learn as well as experienced many things.  I noticed that, I’m getting better and better about not taking things too personally, even if it’s difficult at times to remember that.

Have a lovely weekend, friends, and I will see you again next time.

 .....^^.....

Alas

Dear blog,

Today is Thursday indeed. Obviously! hello...I found out something that I know to be true.

I have longed for this and proudly to say, I'm free from any relationship. I tried hardly to explain to her, but seemed I had to let the time to make it happen. Today was the day, where I've got my life back as a normal person who dream of big dreams. Nobody can stop me. Me and my life again. I can do whatever I want to do and not to bother of bugging people around and being bugged by vermin like you. Bugging is more than just a stupid thing one will do. Stop bugging around ok. Everything I do, is because I love my life. At last, I'm free.

Have a nice day!

Attitude? no problem

If it started to rain.....it rains like shit....
I don't care what people are saying about me...
but I do care when my best friends talking trash about me...
If you wanted to live in this shit...go ahead guys...
Tears is something I always hold but when its time, I will cry like a baby..
Baby is cute..but shit is nasty..
no one wants to live in this shit...

Mind my language! all seems to be upside down...
urghhh....

toodles...

I'm alright then

I'm lost in this world full of darkness...
Living in the darkness overshadows by other people's life...
the bright blue moon shines in the middle of the night...
Living behind its radiance...which trembled behind the closing doors..

Assume that I know everything like I have it at the back of my hand...
But the hand sometimes can't hide anything...
hands do bad things....
can't be trusted any longer...

I just don't want to scare myself with this dangerous life...
It was 3 hours ago...when I received a message.
It was full of dark and evil forces in it..
one might not see with its bare eyes...and couldn't listen to the sound of the tiny creepy little things..

War isn't very pleasant to hear when you're sick...
music is the finest lullaby you might listen when you're alone..
something is not right here....

That's a lie! 
That's a lie....

Its not me who blurted it out! 
You must've been overwhelmed by all those lies....
I'm certainly not understand..
Giving orders and what not....I thought you're my friend....
I can't find my way back...
I'm lost...
Lost in this world full of darkness..... 

Comel

 

^^

.............

It's WED

This afternoon I had a great day off from class. The weather was beautiful, yet it rained quite heavily after that. I had a headache and lied on the bed after taking my med. I kinda miss my time with family and friends, where we ate delicious foods, and spent quality time together.  After working so much, it was so nice to relax and unwind. 

I hope you all had a great time too!