Random thoughts and feelings

Dear blog,

Often we find ourselves stuck in tight situations where no one can help us. We have to help and deal with every situation ourselves. Things happened for a reason. What I know for sure that Allah test us according to our capabilities. God's plan is the great. We pray everyday that we could go through the hard times and able to solve our problems. 

As we grow up, many sweet and bad things that had happened in our past lives have becoming our life lessons. We grow to be more wiser and our only hope is to deal with life that full of surprises. Often people with different background have different ways of thinking and the feelings are mixed up. We should bear in mind that we are not alone in these feelings. Every person that comes from all walks of life will eventually experience days where they are feeling lost in life, are losing interest in life or are feeling confused and lost at the same time.

Every day is a learning process for us. Allah never stop teaching us. We learn how to be alone and comfortable in our own skin that will then give us confidence and a sense of self-reliance. 

What writing means to me

Dear blog,

To become a good writer, it requires a lot and for some people like me it takes me more than motivation and guts to start writing.  In some ways writer like me is a sorry lot. I rarely look at something I wrote and say ‘perfect!’

Give me a moment or a day I will come back to the same article and I’d find dozens of mistakes. Well, to me writing is simply a craft that I never get it perfect. 

Each day I always strive to be better. Somehow I know creatives tend to be perfectionist and writing requires us to keep learning and improving. But that’s good because the drive makes us improve our work and only through practice and effort will make us a good writer. 

I may not be born with good writing skills, but I can say I am one of those who are driven.

Toodles!

What is it really like?

Dear blog, 

Its been 5 years since I reported myself in the system. I’ve grown so much ever since. Working in this field is not solely focus on the teaching but I need to be prepared in so many ways. Teaching is just imparting knowledge but as a full fledge teacher I must be ready for students to open up their hearts, sharing their dreams and deepest fear. We were once kids and we knew how it felt like growing up without guidance and no one to talk to. What I can do is to help them as much as I possibly could to achieve their potential and provide opportunities for later part of their lives. 

Besides, what I noticed is that, being a teacher we need to be more flexible in everything we do as well as when dealing with students’ problems and the issues including childhood experiences, abuses, social life, family, bullying, inequality and all sorts. 

Truth to be told that these students will soon grow and enter different stages of life. So they will eventually experience whats the real deal of the world they live in.  It is a challenge for us teachers to provide good advice and set good examples for them. 

Well, life is not always a bed of roses.

My day

Dear blog its been awhile. My bad not being able to write anything good here. I hope everything is well and looking forward to do and find good things in life.

find your light

Dear blog, 

Ive not been writing anything in here since the last post. I have a lot of of things to share here, but I just couldn't find the right time to do it. Well, since Ive been working, its eeally hard to keep up with blogging stuffs. It is so much different now. Being a grown up isn't always easy. I faced many ups and downs whilst being what I am now. 

Handling stress is another thing that I find most difficult. Trust me. Its not easy if you are not prepared. Im glad Im still alive. 

2016

2017

2018

2019

Those years hold different amazing life experiences. I always make doa that I would find something great each days. Grateful to God that every thing that have came to me so far taught me to become more wiser and stronger. I took up every challenges positively and stayed low profiled everytime I got caught up with things. Its just a matter  of how we react to it tho. To get something bigger, I need to step back and observe. By doing that, I could see what was needed and which was more important. As what people always say, prioritze whats matter the most.

There're a lot more to talk about.

Just see the light and hope for more.

Don't Be Trashy, Let's Change

Dear blog,

For the past few days, we have been carried out a design thinking project in our school. Our school is participating in I CAN School Challenge. 

Let's make a difference! start now. together we spread the good vibes. we had come up with interactive recycling bins to solve the rubbish issue in our school. with design thinking, the children can contribute from their hearts and with love. we should play our role in preserving a better school environment for all. Congrats everyone!

Now is the time. Change is possible. We have decided to be more efficient with our project and will ask our team members support specialists and other NGOs about ways to improve this project. We need to develop a software or apps that can alert or notify everyone about the responsibilities on keeping the school clean.

This project also based on the three principles :
1. Quick Impact
2. Be bold
3. Long lasting

Just a starter

Dear blog,

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hello there. I've not been writing anything in here since last year. I've been busy the whole year. 

There are so many things to write and to share to be honest. Just that I don't have the right time to drop my thoughts here. 

Early this week, I made promise to myself to start writing again in this blog. SO today I try my best to open it and have myself writing. I don't really have anything in mind for now, just that I feel its time fro me to write something. 

I don't know where to begin. Writing is merely expressing thoughts into something. Whatever comes to my mind, I try to put it here nicely. 

Even 2018 has not come to an end yet, but I've gone thru so many wonderful and some quite awful things thru out the year. Each year I learned many different things and experience different feelings and met different kinds of people. I feel grateful and thankful I still have my family with me every minute of the day. What do I do without them. I learned a lot about myself. Knowing who I really was. Sometimes, I too do wrong things. But that doesn't mean I have to stop forgiving myself. Well, to live this life, I need to be brave and embrace all the difficulties in life. Insyaallah, Allah will always be there to guide me thru this world. 

I think I gotta stop now, enough with the warm up.

will write again soon with a lot of things to tell about.

I will miss you everyday

Dear blog, 

I think the purest of souls, those with the most fragile of hearts, must be meant for a short life. They can't be tethered or held in your palm forever.

I'm sorry I couldn't write here for so long. I have been very busy. Busy like a bee. So much has happened over the past few months and still I hardy find any time to write.

I was badly in fever by the recent weather after I got back from Sarawak. Alhamdulillah, I recovered very fast. 

On the end of November last year, I was shocked and saddened by the news of my beloved friend Amir had an accident and passed away on that day. It was supposed to be his last day of practical and we were hoping to see him on December.But it turned out the last day we see each other was on June. He was very dear to me as I'll always remember how much fun we had and all the other sweet things we did together. 

It was Friday. It had been a normal morning and the weather was fine. I was in the class. Not noticing that I was really agigated by the time as I couldn't wait that long to end the class. I never know this thing would happened. 

Death leaves us with a heartache that no one can heal, love leaves us with a memory that no one can steal.

Rest in peace Amir. Thank you for everything. Thank you for the friendship, love, help, ups and downs, good and bad times together.... thank you for beinf my friend when I was in need. You are a trully a friend indeed. 

Towards the End

Dear blog, 

The UPSR exam was over and finally I got the time to relax and have the time for myself. What a relief. Only that, I am busy with courses, LINUS, and preparing the exam papers for the upcoming final exam.
Meanwhile, I have just finished my EPSA the online courses yesterday. I'm done with all the 12 courses and got the certs already. These online courses are replacing the PTM and induction course which the KPM said that we the new gov servants don't have to attend anymore. 

Tution? well, I'm sick and tired with tuition! I've been teaching extra classes for two years and thinking of to quit doing it. I'm honestly tired! I m very grateful since I got to stop from teaching under IBS tuition centre and I had to go to the client's house to teach their children. I don't mind to teach and share my knowledge with them but unfortunately the parents were too proud to say thank you and had no manners! I don't mind though. The parents can sometimes be so forceful and thought that I was their servants. Now that I'm free from them and don't want to do home tutor anymore!
Some students came to my house for tuition and sometimes I don't feel like doing it. So I have decided to stop. Next year gonna be tough for me and so be it! I will try to focus more on the school and my job. Extra jobs are just killing me softly. I need the time to rest and be happy with my life. 

talk again sooner.

My Convocation Day

Dear blog,

I believe that convocation day means a lot to many people. It is one of the greatest moment in someone's life, right? so as it does to me. 

I was overjoyed with everything that comes to me during 2016. I cant thank you enough to Allah for everything I have now and then. Alhamdulillah. I have successfully completed my degree programme in 2015, and still I cant forget how wonderful the feeling was, when I finally got through the ups and downs before I got my degree in my hands.

I also believe that every cloud has a silver lining. I am grateful with my life. It wasn't easy since I had to go through a lot with life and I pity my mother had to work day and night to earn a living. I don't know how many times I had been crying and those experiences made me more stonger and determined towards my life now. For what ever reasons, I'd never leave my family. To me, this convocation day was not for me, but I was there for my family, who have been there all the time to support and back me up for all these years of life.

The convo was held at the Malaysia Agro Exposition Park Serdang since IPGM don't have their own big hall, so there was it, our convo. Well at least we've got a place to be celebrated at right?? 

Two days earlier, I had to attend the rehearsal before the big day come. So I went there alone. stayed a couple of nights at my friend's. Something was going on at home and it saddened me that my father couldn't be there on my big day. It was sad really. On Tuesday morning I went there with my friend and I had to wait my sister and mother to come in the afternoon. I was really worried about them. By noon, the place was full of people. I can't describe how I felt that time looking at mak and sister came to see me on that day. How can I repay them...they were all the time for me, came all the way for me... and my heart felt so sad coz people always do their best for me... and what can I do for them in return? I pray to God that please grant me with good health so that I can work hard to make a living for them from now on. Let me ease their burden and let me take care of them. I am very lucky to have such wonderful family. May Allah reward them with jannah. Ameen..

There, I got to meet up with my colleagues and other friends from other IPGs too. Actually, we didnt get the chance to spend that much time together as everyone was busy with their families and other stuffs... running here and there... the time was limited for us to meet up. But thats okay, I also were rushing for photograph-takings with my family and waiting to get inside the hall. My mum and sister were not in the hall, they were just waited patiently and watched me through the screen at the lobby. I didnt want to trouble them as the event was too long. We went inside the hall around 2.30pm and finished at 5.45pm. Just imagine they have to arrange everything for 6 days in rows. 

When we had settled everything, we were rushing to go back home. I was really exhausted and pity my sister n her kids had to wait that long till the end. We went straight home after that. Along the way back home was the time I felt this weird feeling. The feeling was different than I thought it should be. No words could describe it. The feeling that was infused with many other kinds of feelings. Maybe because of I was really tired that time. We reached home around 8.30pm and had to prepare for school the next day. I was really lucky to get the posting before the convocation day. Alhamdulillah... 

Everything that happened to me happened with God's will. Once we believe and always being grateful and have patience in ourselves, things will come easy to us.

Reading is My Pleasure

Dear blog, 

Have you ever heard that reading makes a man? I'm sure that everyone of us has been told to read since we were young. The wisdom of it pounded into us by parents and teachers from young to adulthood. I started to make reading as my hobby since I was in secondary school. I am happy as I was surrounded by people who love  to read and reading has becoming the intergral part of our society then and now. Since then, I started to trot to the library and the bookshops. I pick out the books I think I should read. 

During the college years, my passion in reading has becoming greater. I develop some other skills especially on how to 'butch' a story and make a book review more in depth. I took children literature and English Literature as my subjects during the TEsl degree programme. Though I found it difficult at first, finally I got the hang of it.

I would go to the bookstores twice a month to browse though the book shelves to find new interesting titles that might be worth for my reading.
Sometimes I always have this question in mind, 'how do we know we have picked a good book for a good read?' To me, one way of making sure of a good read is to surf the web. I'd surf the web for reviews and critiques of the books I wanted to read. This will help me to decide the value of  the books. Some reviews might be biased but at least it will give you an idea of what the book is about.






Talk again soon.
Happy reading!